Freckles' Thought For This Day...

Once you replace negative thoughts

with positive ones,

you'll start having positive results.

-Willie Nelson

Cultivate a Thankful Spirit

I have a friend that has a little garden. She takes pictures of the progress of her garden and shares it on facebook. She takes great pride in her gardener accomplishments and says that it relaxes her. It is really cute and I have heard others tease her about it but not in a mean way. However it has made me think deeper than the green sprouts in the soil. I thought about the time that she takes to cultivate her garden. In gardening, there is so much preparation that takes place followed by work and maintenance. When something goes wrong or if the garden doesn't seem to be reaching its potential or simply not progressing as expected. The gardener will try to see what the problem is and try to make it better. The gardener does whatever it takes to cultivate the garden and make a positive out of what seems to be mildly negative but fixable.

Let us be grateful to people who make us happy;

they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.

Marcel Proust

We have to cultivate a thankful spirit through all the good and bad times. We must remember that all the trials and tribulations that we may be facing are just a test of our faith. Without thankfulness in our hearts we will live in perpetual spiritual defeat. A thankful heart is the key to having peace of mind. There are the simple things such as waking up this morning but it goes much deeper than just that. What about being in your right mind, being able to breathe on your own, open your eyes, move your limbs. Simple and often taken for granted. I know I have said it before but it is a lot easier to be negative than it is to be positive. I find that rather ironic especially since there are so many things to be thankful for in life. Do not get me wrong. We are all very human and we have moments when get on our soapboxes and complain about all that we do not have and want and desire. That is natural. But just like the gardener, we should take the time and cultivate that negative spirit and make it be positive.

Balance is the key to success in all things.

Do not neglect your mind, body, or spirit.

Invest time and energy in all of them equally - it will be the best investment you ever make,

not just for your life but for whatever is to follow.

Tanya Wheway

If you have ready me you know that I have been going through the storms of life but I now like to call my character building experience. It just sounds better. I have had plenty of dark not so positive moments where I truly wondered if the one above that hears and sees all blinked. I am truly going through however I am often humbled by the simple things. Life, love, family, good friends. We all go through some things in this game we call life. However we are blessed with choice. We have the ability to choose to be woe is me or thankful. There is always worse but realistically, it may just be time to cultivate your spirit. Think about it.

“Be aware of what you have in hand rather than to be for what you don’t.

Everyone will be grateful to what you have.”

Kurt Avish

Be thankful for what you have and you will end up having more.

But if you concentrate on what you don't have,

you'll never, ever have enough.

 Oprah Winfrey

We take such pride in stuff, keeping up with the Jones', believing we are the Jones' and wanting to have more. So why not just be thankful. Stuff is nothing with an ugly spirit. We do not always give ourselves the same treatment that we give our stuff or sharing it or simply having an attitude of gratitude. It all comes with the spirit. So, I figure if we all work as hard on cultivating the spirit as we do cultivating our stuff - we could see what thankfulness really feels like. Just a thought.

When I started counting my blessings, my whole life turned around.

-- Willie Nelson--

“A thankful heart is not only the greatest virtue,

but the parent of all the other virtues.”

--Cicero--

All this to say that the holidays are growing near and I have already heard folks inquiring about what to put on their list and what they are getting so and so. It is tough when the money is not what it used to be. These are different times. This time last year, I had a job, a car and was trying to figure out if I was going home to be with my family or spending it with a friend who had just lost her father a few months prior. This year, I am unemployed, carless, still grieving my father's passing and trying to figure out if I am moving back home to get back on my feet. However with all of that I am so thankful. I am thankful that I am still in my right mind which speaks volumes if you have ever lost a parent. I am thankful that I have had friends that will take, pick me or allow me to use their car. I am thankful that I have family that will allow me to come home to get back on my feet. I am thankful for having a father that loved me enough to live as long as he did. I am thankful that God chose me for this storm so that I could see me for who I am.

Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

-1 Thessalonians 5:18 (NRSV)

So, yes I would love to get a job for Christmas and car would be great too. Yes, I could find a bunch of things to complain about but it will not make them better or change what they are but maybe if I cultivate my thankful spirit I will be able to reap something positive from my harvest. After all God's gift to me is this: When I look for a reason to give thanks, I find it. I am seeing old things in new ways. Thanks be to God!

30: The Reinvention of Me

Yes, well I am so thankful and ready to let go of the woman that I was in my 20’s. My 20’s were full of growing pains and what we will call CHARACTER BUILDING EXPERIENCES. My 30s are going to be so much better. I plan on reinventing the woman I was in my 20s and here are a few things that I have realized.

Here is my Flirty 30 List:

1. I can truly say that I have seen God move in my life. There were several times in my 20s when I thought that I couldn’t make it or couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. He brought me through and is always in my corner – TRUST and FAITH.

2. I now like the reflection that stares back at me in the mirror and can say I love her.

3. Every time that I look in the mirror and see my daddy. I think about him and wonder if he is proud of me and I even stare in the mirror sometimes and feel him looking back at me. It brings me peace. When I lost my father, I lost a piece of me but the reflection in the mirror gives me hope in grief.

4. I am trying to find my passion as far as work but UNEMPLOYMENT will do that to you. I have worked and have had a wonderful career where I have made lots of people lots of money. I have learned a lot and taken good notes. I have also been unappreciated, overworked and underpaid but I have made some strong relationship too. However at this moment Freckles needs a job!

5. I now understand the saying be careful what you speak – as the journey to the 30 came about. I recognized that there were some things (love, people, feelings etc) that I was not going to take into 30. I said it and said it believing that it was going to be a grown up things that would just people and possibly some not so sexy habits. However I did not realize that it would be my father and my job. Both were very life changing and could not have imagined it was going to be like this but I will embrace this change and be a better woman because of it.

6. I am more like my mother and father than I would have ever expected. My mother is an awesome woman and I blessed that she is my mother. (thanks mom – she reads my blog too sometimes).

7. I enjoy taking pictures of myself at different angles and in different moments. I like to take pictures for sharing and some for private. Once upon a time I didn’t think that I was good enough, pretty enough or important enough but now I am and I am worthy. So now I suppose that it is why I love taking my picture of ME.

8. I LOVE Shoes!!! Stilleto Queen. I like them high, strappy and super sexy – however I have not had the opportunity to Get In but that is another conversation. (FULL TEETH SMILE) Shoes make me feel good. I have been through a multitude of sizes over the last 10 years. Again, my 20s – ugh! Ladies, check out my blog on that. I am sure that you will all feel me on that subject.

9. I try to keep a notebook in my purse at all times. Just in case I hear something or feel something worth possibly writing about. I have a number of topics that I would like to write about and keep them in my notebook with notes. It’s like carrying a baby. Some stories you have to nourish and hold onto until they are ready to deliver.

10. I have a hard time smiling through pain and not showing my emotions on my face. I hope that this is something that I will grow out of a bit in my 30s but I do see it happening anytime soon. I am going to work on controlling it better.

11. I am a recovering grudge holder. I have moment where I feel the way that I feel and have a hard time letting go. When I feel like I have been wronged I hold onto it even when the grudgee has moved on. I have let go of a lot of things that I tried to hold onto in my 20s. I am glad that they are not coming into my 30s.

12. I am sometimes overly flirtatious. Too sensual and too touchy feely. It sometimes turns into too sexual but that is possibly a blog within itself so I will leave that at that.

13. I am so blessed to be surrounded by good people. I mean truly genuine people that have loved me in spite of me.

14. It is very easy to be negative and often a little harder to be positive. I succumb to the negative sometimes but try to find a way to pass through it. There are so many things to be thankful for in life. The simple things like waking up and being able to do breath, walk, see or hear. I have often found myself concerned about what I do not have or cannot do. I lose sight of the little things. In my 30s I will be sure to speak what I am thankful for everyday.

15. I am a bit of an attention whore but DON’T JUDGE ME! Lol. It is not as bad as it use to be but it is what it is and I recognize this thing about me.

16. Flaws can be Fab – there will be a blog about this one day but right now it is still in the womb.

17. I am more in tune with my strengths and weaknesses than ever before.

18. I haven’t always loved me but growth is an amazing process.

19. I can appreciate finding love and losing love and I look forward to finding love again.

20. I don’t have a ticking clock and I have come to terms with it. I am not particularly desiring motherhood. My mother cannot appreciate this fact but not every little girl grows up to want to be a mother but I do want to be a wife. If the Lord blesses me with a husband it may be negotiable but other than that – I’m Good!

21. I believe in being discreet. It is not on the sneaky tip but there are something and situations that are not for all or anyone to know.

22. The truth sometimes hurts but does set you free. Once upon a time I was insecure and felt the need to be validated by things, people or titles. Once I accepted that it was not about the things or people and moreso of a need that I thought I needed – I was set free. It hurt and hurt other people but it’s not always about them.

23. I can no longer apologize for the past. It has happened and there is nothing I can do to change it. If I hold onto it any longer I will not be able to move forward.

24. I am entitled to feel how I feel. (as in period)

25. I am addicted to Facebook but having a hard time getting a handle on Twitter.

26. I often wonder if I will ever grow out of being boy/man crazy. I love men!!! Especially black men. I do not want to discriminate but I love brothas… mmmmmm!

27. I am still trying to let go of regret – this is a work in progress.

28. I love Charms blow pop. I believe that I have an oral fixation. It is mainly when I am drinking. I always have them in my purse.

29. When I love I love hard and don’t like my love to be mishandled but I am more open to it than some.

30. George Bernard Shaw said it best “Life isn’t finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself". I have never had a problem with turning 30 and in fact I embrace it. I believe that it will be a better than my 20s and I am going to be a better woman.

Just For Today!

JUST FOR TODAY: I will live through this day only. I will not brood about yesterday or obsess abouttomorrow. I will not set far-reaching goals or try toovercome all of my problems at once.I know that I can do something for 24 hours that would overwhelm me if I had to keep it up for a lifetime. JUST FOR TODAY: I will be happy. I will not dwell on thoughts that depress me. If my mind fills with clouds, I will chase them away and fill it with sunshine. JUST FOR TODAY: I will accept what is. I will face reality. I will correct those things I can correct and accept those I cannot. JUST FOR TODAY: I will improve my mind. I will read something that requires effort, thought andconcentration. I will not be a mental loafer. JUST FOR TODAY: I will make a conscious effort to be agreeable. I will be kind and courteous to those who cross my path, and I'll not speak ill of others. Iwill improve my appearance, speak softly, and not interrupt when someone else is talking. Just for today, I will refrain from improving anybodybut myself. JUST FOR TODAY: I will do something positive to improve my health. If I'm a smoker, I'll quit. If I am overweight, I will eat healthfully -- if only just for today. And not only that, I will get off the couch and take a brisk walk, even if it's only around the block. JUST FOR TODAY: I will gather the courage to do what is right and take responsibility for my own actions.

Prayer of Saint Francis:"Lord, make me an instrument of your peace;

"Where there is hatred, let me sow love;

"Where there is injury, pardon;

"Where there is doubt, faith;"Where there is despair, hope;

"Where there is darkness, light;

"Where there is sadness, joy;

"O Divine Master, grant that I may not as much seek tobe consoled as to console;"To be loved as to love."For it is in giving that we are pardoned;"It is in dying that we are born to eternal life."

Amen.