Thursday, September 24, 2009

In Search of Significance

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
-Marianne Williamson

I have often wondered where I fit in this world and what my true purpose is. I know it sounds rather presumptuous but it’s honest. I have been thinking and reflecting. I have had some time on my hands. I have often been hindered by my fear of failure. My intelligent being knows that I cannot fail until I try and realistically I am not a failure but I do fear failure but does that really mean that I am scared of success. The reason why I question this is because when successful don’t measure by money or the time that it took to achieve. They measure by their actual accomplishment. They felt the desire to make a move and went forth.
I have so many passions and there are so many things that I can good at doing but pursuing is not necessarily one of strong attributes. I have often gotten frustrated when a friend does not utilize their talents and make it happen for them. I get invested in their dreams and keep them encouraged but somehow I lose focus of my dreams and ambitions. I don’t move forward and don’t actively pursue them as I tell others. Does this make me a hypocrite?

Why is it that I cannot pave my way or move forward in my desires and passions? What is it that holds me back from my personal success? I don’t want to continue being a person that blocks my own success especially when I know that I am fully capable. I am wonderful woman with quite a mouth piece. I have the gift of gab and encouragement of others but at this point I need to encourage myself. It helps to put pen to paper and filter out all of your thoughts. My thoughts sometimes hold me hostage at night and I fall into a dark place but by grace darkness always turns to light. It’s time to move forward and make some moves in life. The most reliable path to success is a simple one that anyone who chooses to do so can follow. Dream big dreams and take small steps, one after another after another until you're there. One step at a time and no waiting on that one big opportunity that may never show.

Did you know that the hermit crab looks for a shell that fits him, and then lives in it until he outgrows it? At that point he has to scurry along the ocean floor and find a bigger one; it's a process that repeats itself throughout his entire life. I have been clinging to something that no longer fits me, just because it's easy and familiar. What worked for me yesterday may not work today. I am now officially ok with that. I am going to step out on faith and pursue something I am passionate about and make it do what it do.

I have you had this feeling? Maybe it's a job you've outgrown, a relationship you need to reexamine or a behavior you need to change. Regardless of what it is, never become so 'settled' that you can't let go and move on when you need to. When God says it's time to move on, it's because there's another shell out there that will fit you even better. But you can't take occupancy until you vacate the old one. So how about it - are you ready for bigger things?
What's your passion?

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