Tuesday, September 8, 2015

For Your HEAD Service

WARNING: This is a touchy subject and I thought long and hard (no pun intended) about stimulating this conversation amongst adults but I deem it necessary. Again, this is only one interpretation that should offer some assistance and thought to all parties. Some will agree and others will disagree – all are ok and accepted. This is a two sided conversation and is more than the initial attention grabber. Please take into consideration that this conversation is meant for mature adults that can handle all verbiage being used. If you are sensitive to sexual matters, please do not read this post. Thank you.

Shall we proceed?

Speak into the mic, just kiss it or lick it a little bit, puff the pipe – it won’t make you choke, say hello to my lil friend (yes some are smaller than others), blow the whistle, it won’t get hard if you don’t help it out, or simply can I get some head? 

All said while trying to guide head to head. I am sure that there are several ladies that could create a list that would both be ridiculous and ironic.  It is amazing the things that some men come up with in order to get some “head”.  I do not understand some men’s desire or need to ask for some head, penis suckage or fellatio. Now do not get me wrong there is nothing wrong with a little head.  It is, depending on the situation and/or relationship, essential to a moment.  Let’s all be honest here. We all like to receive it but honestly we don’t all like to give it or give our best. Most importantly there are women that don’t always think that it is the sexiest thing to do. Some like it, love, adore it, can’t stand it and would rather just do it regular.  Generally the point of “hooking up” would be for enjoyment unless he’s selfish, which many are (both sides).  Back to the point.  Head shouldn’t be a negotiation or a bargaining tool.  One shouldn’t feel the need to beg for it or act as if it is life or death without.  Yeah, I said it and some just make it feel that way especially when we all profess to be adult, right?

Don’t get me wrong, I get it, to an extent.  I understand that it feels real good. I understand that it may possibly look very sexy to watch and feel the warmth and wetness along with the softness of her lips along your man muscle. [GO AHEAD, HAVE A MOMENT OF SILENCE].  The pleasure of laying back, relaxing and not having to take control of the sexual situation.  I get it.  I also understand that it is a part of sex and yes head is to be enjoyed by most but of course when done correctly [STICK A PEN IN THAT WE MAY NEED TO REVISIT THAT ANOTHER TIME]. Both, like less biting and teeth used – we agree. However, question is why must you ask or use some sort of not so sexy verbiage to insinuate your desire?  Why are you ok with asking for head in the first place?

For some oral sex is more intimate than actual intercourse and is a bigger leap of faith. After all it is all right there and it’s your mouth and we both… well, we will just say that it is something to think about if you are a not so  and/or fresh person. We don’t always ask the necessary questions outside of are you disease free. Does she brush her teeth or take care of her mouth – does he use soap and clean down under his balls? And such as. I mean really – we all need to be a bit more selective and more concerned. The world is a very crazy place these days. [JUST A THOUGHT – you cannot suck or lick on every and/or anybody]. Then there is the matter of what am I getting out of the deal especially if we are not a long term situation? Seriously, after you nut, if you get to that point, do you have come back, is that it or will you be returning the favor and do you expect this all the time? I would like to believe that it can be more of the preliminary step, a kind of foreplay, rather than the main event and it’s not always done accordingly but each and every situation is different. Govern yourself accordingly.

Just a few thoughts that run through mind quickly after the initial inquiry but my main point of thought is, why are you even asking? I don’t get that. It seems like if it is going to happen it’s going to happen and it should not be expected but moreso appreciated.  If we are random to each other or not necessarily exclusive what makes it be necessary.  After all if it didn’t automatically happen, what makes you think that you are worth the service? Now, I don’t want to hurt any feelings or even offend anyone but did you consider that this service is given to some and only a privilege to others or that you just don’t meet the desire.  Sometimes it just doesn’t feel right or feel pleasured upon the part of the giver.  A woman will initiate her desires, please believe – have you thought about that? Have you ever sat back and considered the willingness of some and the reluctance of others. Think about it!!!

I have often wondered if the inquiry comes from a selfish a place or is it one of those activities that should be added to my resume under the skill section.  Should a chick be flattered that you thought of her enough to ask her to suck you off or get you started? Should she feel privileged that you say that she is so good that you just want it all the time? Should she think that it is in the best interest of her health and womanhood to proceed or that you may not be attracted and/or interested otherwise? Did you have Wendys or did you have McCormick and Schmitt's? When you ask do you consider that you may be taking the joy or desire from her? Do you even think with your actual head before asking for head?

It’s funny that this seems to be an ongoing debate or even a conversation that is always not agreed upon. It’s one of those touchy subjects that is sometimes felt uncalled for or uncivilized.  Us all being grown has nothing to do with giving or even receiving.  It is the comfort to all parties involved. The real inquiry here is not asking for head but the matter we don’t all think about what we are doing before we do it. DID YOU CATCH THAT?

We do not always take into consideration the reactions to our actions in advance or thought. Like a man once told me pouting, sulking and dropping hints are not good strategies when you don’t get your way. True gratification is mental so please give it some head.


Passion's Daughter said...

Good evening,

I really liked this post. Very nicely written. I personally think that the sexy is in NOT asking. I think it creates a whole sexy kind of mood when it's done naturally. When asked, to me, it seems so impersonal, for some reason. I could be off on this a bit, but I just feel that way. It could be the control freak in me that wants to initiate my own actions and not be 'coached' into how to treat the dick. I don't know.

On the other hand, I won't lie when I say I expect that I'm going to receive as a part of the gift of entering my warmth. I love oral - especially because it's the first climax I ever experienced so it's a very sentimental thing for me LOL! If you can understand that.

Thanks for the post. I am going to follow because I like the tone of your blog.

Take care,

FreckleFace said...

Thank you sista. I appreciate that.

I feel you completely. This has been a hot and heated discussion amongst my fasebook friends. They are truly feeling some kind of way. Lol.

To be honest I dont have an issue with giving and of course not receiving but I do not like to be asked. I am very vocal and in tune with my sexuality. I dont like to be asked and I am not selfish - i return the favor and sometimes I am into it and I am just inspired to initiate. I just do not do it all the time or to anyone. I believe that felatio is a delicacy not just everyday 99 cent chicken sandwhich. it shouldbe appreciated and enjoyed. Although the world doesnt work like that. I do it because I want to and I am in tune with pleasuring u which pleasures me. My surface dries up with the thirstiness of a brotha. I can go on and on which seems to be happening on the FB.

I hope to hear from you again and as always words, peace and blessings,


Traci Lavette said...

I feel just like you, girl! It is most definitely a delicacy! I consider it to be that "icing on the cake" in return for 'good behavior' LOL! Besides, when you are known for doing it ALL THE TIME, it takes away from any suspense...


Vett said...

Personally, as a guy I'm always in conversations about who gives head and how good or bad. My lady and I have been together for 3 1/2 years and did it come up? yup. I don't like the idea of her giving me head because for one reason or another I find it disrespectful and degrading. But for some reason I don't see it the other way around. I felt like I would be obligated to do it. lol No bull shit... you ever hear "what ya man/girl dont do, someone else will". Well shit I felt like I had to. I kinda feel like she wants me to but she always tells me no. I guess to keep it even. She says she never sucked a dick but she received head in a pass relationship. Which makes me beleive she does. I also think she lies when i ask that because she knows how I feel about it. What do you think? Anyways neither one of us do it of crave it... but i go in when it comes to sex and we both enjoy it.

FreckleFace said...

I think that there is a time and place for everything. I don't believe that it is a bad thing at all if used properly. I do not care for it to be the main event because I like for my sex to be a pleasure for 2. Like I stated before, I dont mind but I think that it is not very every dude that I "hook up" with. Not saying that I am promiscuous but I do like what I like when I like it. I believe that it should be a pleasant and passionate. There should be some desire. I like it and it is a turn on but there are other things that can be sucked. I just dont like to be asked. I like to decide if I am going to do it and just go for it. The moment changes when I say no I dont wanna... hell I dont ask. I like it and sometimes depending on the brotha it is the only time I get there but I dont have to have it.

Vett - I respect your position and there are so many outlets that objectify felatio but it can be sexy and sensual and special. It doesnt have to be all the time but there should be some desire. If you and your girl are good with it - so be it but do not completely right it off. talk about it and communicate. I think it could be beautitul. However it is just my opinion.

THanks for reading... Freckles

Anonymous said...

Early in our marriage, my DW would if I asked. 14 years later, she says no...which means yeah, I've been asking. I guess I am selfish. But thanks Freckles for putting it in more words than my lady is willing to share. I'm trying to get it (understand it, that is). Thanks again, B.

Freckles said...

I am thinking about revisiting this post with a part two. Please stay tuned.

Soul Powers said...

Yeah, I don't really get the asking thing either. so, I just don't. If she wants to, she will. Usually she does (mine is kinda pretty. lol)


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